top of page

On the Other Side of Fear

Firstly, welcome to the blog.

This is a space for brain dumps, honest conversations, hard thoughts, massive failures, new experiences and tips I learn along the way in my journey of becoming a Digital Rebel.

I'll be laying down the goods, the bads and most definitely the uglies as I embark on levelling up my life to build a digital empire.

And I guess you’re here to get in on the experience in hopes to see another one bite the dust in creating wealth the wifi way, or maybe you’re embarking on a journey yourself in this big digital world and looking for someone to relate to. Whoever you are, and whatever your reason, I am happy you’re here.

Say hello to day one. And today’s topic is ME!

I came from the rugged west coast of Canada, where from sea to sky there is always beauty. But behind beauty can be chaos, and I managed to get caught in the line of fire. Life was fast, it was daring, it was enticing, it was thrilling… until it wasn’t anymore.

I grew up in what would be considered middle class, I guess… Maybe the lower side. We always had a roof over our head, always had food to eat, the power was always on… but it was always just enough and never anything more. My father raised 3 children without help, he worked hard to support us. And as you can imagine money and finances were a regular topic of discussion, but the never ended well.

Though I was smart, I did not enjoy school. I dreamed of big things, of being successful, and able to take care of everyone around me. I knew I was meant for this life of success, but didn’t know how to get there. So I gave up. I let go of my high-school career, became a multi-successful drop-out, and stopped my pursuit of getting a “fancy education” like all my peers did. I let go of my worth and spiralled in the madness that I thought was a fun life.

After a nasty split with my then boyfriend, I knew I had to get out. I was 20 years old when I left my hometown for the very first time. It was the scariest decision I had ever made. I'd never been that far away from the place I grew up. I'd never been that far away from my family.

What I didn't realise, it was the best decision I could have ever made.

This was the first time I experienced freedom on the other side of fear.

From then on, it was a constant chase for the taste of freedom. Knowing every time I was scared, I could push through and greener pastures would be on the other side.

I didn't know that this “chase for the taste” would eventually take me to the other side of the world.

At 23 I jumped on a plane to Aotearoa New Zealand, with no plans. Just a suitcase and world as my oyster. My skills were limited to the hospitality industry, though being a high-school drop out I did manage to complete my education through alternative means. But that didn't give me much hope for getting a job, let alone a career outside of being a bartender. Minimum Wage at less than 40hours a week isn't a great way to live, especially with the lifestyle that comes with restaurant life... Lets say, my relationship with money wasn’t great.

It looked a bit like this:

Paycheque → Pay Bills → Spend → Broke Until Payday.

Paycheque → Pay Bills → Spend → Broke Until Payday.

Paycheque → Pay Bills → Spend → Broke Until Payday.

It was a vicious cycle that I didn’t know how to break.

After trying to get my act together after years of late nights and long days I finally found my opportunity to ditch the hospo life. I joined a local CrossFit Gym, managed to build a network of friends from all walks of life. My self came back, my confidence came back. And through my competitive tendencies, my kind nature, and my eagerness to take on any challenge put in front of me, I was noticed. Not as an athlete, but as someone who could push through with a winning attitude, even in the middle of an awful work out.

My network of friends were able to help me land an entry level position for a Corporate IT Company. I was ecstatic. I finally made it.

I thought to myself:

"I've got a big girl job now.

I've got big girl hours.

I've got a big girl salary.

I'm all set!"

But I got comfortable in this "big girl stuff" pretty quickly. And soon enough slipped into old money habits.

That was 7 year ago now. And since, I have worked hard to network and build solid work relationships, I've taken every opportunity to up skill and learn more about the processes of the business, I even landed a new role. But still-- my relationship with money is almost non-existent, and I constantly feel like I am living on the edge of just okay and I'm pretty fucking broke right now.

2021 was a big year. Smack in the middle of the pandemic, years between visits with my family in Canada due to international lockdowns. Traveling not an option, the cost of taking a flight anywhere was so beyond what I could afford. Not to mention the rising cost of living, outrageous gas prices, job cuts and the pending doom of a global recession... things weren't looking good.

Money, Money, Money.

It was the only word that was in my head.

I had many money related questions:

How do I save enough money to pay off my debts?

How do I change my relationship with money so I don't feel deprived?

How do I earn more money to feel successful?

How do I invest money to secure my future?

Then as I was listening to a podcast, this question came up:

“Who do I have to be, and what do I have to do, to have the things I want?”

And that's when things changed.

Last year, 2022, I turned 31. I decided it was my year to start making the changes so I could really make something of myself. I started writing things down on sticky notes while I was at work, any thought or idea or goal that crept through my brain.

I started building data bases dedicated to all areas of my life. I wrote brain dumps, journaled my days, created spreadsheets to track. I took a deep dive into my inner self, had some uncomfortable conversations, sought professional help to guide me.

I discovered my values, my passions, my dreams.

I got really clear on the things that I want in my life:

  • I want financial independence and literacy so I could buy the things I wanted without having to second guess whether I could afford it.

  • I want to dedicate more time investing in myself and pursuing my passions, without having to worry about taking time off of work.

  • I want an opportunity to be able to spend half of my time in Canada so I can build relationships with my nephews, instead of being the weird, crazy auntie that pops in every second year.

Initially it was all about how much money I could save.

But how could I save when the money I have after bills is put towards paying off debt?

Where can I get educated on how to make additional income streams, without working myself into the ground?

After months of research, and the social algorithms telling me that I could make additional streams of income via several online avenues, I decided to give it a go. Hence this journey in becoming a Digital Entrepreneur.

I found courses and resources that got my ass into gear, and gave me the confidence to get started. Knowing I can utilise my skills and my relentless work ethic to benefit my future. And even if I start to feel the fear again, I know freedom is on the other side.

I am chasing the taste once again, and I am ready to get my hands dirty and get into it!

I embark on this journey while maintaining my values and priorities.

I’m not looking to get rich quick, or leave the security of my corporate career.

My goal is to create financial stability, to heal generational money stories, to pursue my passions and to build a comfortable and sustainable future for myself and my loved ones.

The Mission:

My mission is to show that anyone can achieve financial success, regardless of their background or their education.

Through hard work, grit, determination, and learning the right skills the potential for success is limitless.

bottom of page